I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Randomize
