How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
