Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize