Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
