I forgot how hot balto sounded
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
