Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
