Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
