Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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