ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize