what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
