yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
