i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
