he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
