What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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