Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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