I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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