Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
