Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
