No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
