I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
