if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Bring me that man meat
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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