it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
