Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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