i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
