Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
this hospital has no fireball
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
