I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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