He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
