You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
