Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
