Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
