Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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