how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
