Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
