Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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