The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
