I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
