marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Dignity is for republicans.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Randomize
