i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
