he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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