she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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