Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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