just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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