we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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