summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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