So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
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