so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Did we literally take a cab across the street
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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