last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize