So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I've blown a few things in my day
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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