Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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