i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
